Bored? Teach Kiwi's to be Hillbillies

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Alright... let me explain. This isn't strongman related and would be considered kinda dumb by most people.

Each year my youth group and a community trust put on a 6 day camp for 60 kids between 11 and 13. The kids get divided into 4 teams where they do challenges throughout the week, amazing race and survivor style to decide a winning team. I've been on the camp twice as a leader and both years my team has won. So I'm keen to keep that up.

This year we had about 10 minutes to come up with a team name, so we decided on a Hillbilly theme and called ourselves the HillyBilly Herd, seeing as we're deep in NZ farming country.

Any of you bored guys like Nik, Jett, Paddy and co got any ideas for what we should do? We're gonna need some team gear (with a 50$ budget) to make us stand out (4 leaders, 14 kids), a song/chant and some general Hillbilly-isms for the team.

Seeing as NZ is far from Hillbilly country, any of you guys got some tips?

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Well looks like this thread took off.

http://myweb.tiscali.co.uk/hardpeg/images/hillbillies.jpg

[Eric Jett]

Thrift store!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Buy overalls.

Cut all sleeves off of shirts.

Find old, crappy baseball caps.

Make a sign using a stick and posterboard, spray paint the team name on it. Note I said stick.

Tattered jeans, I am sure every single one will have at least one pair of those or some old jean shorts.

Have at least one child in a ribbed tank top (wife beater) and handcuffed at all times.

[Adam Keep]

Thrift store!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Buy overalls.

Cut all sleeves off of shirts.

Find old, crappy baseball caps.

Make a sign using a stick and posterboard, spray paint the team name on it. Note I said stick.

Tattered jeans, I am sure every single one will have at least one pair of those or some old jean shorts.

Have at least one child in a ribbed tank top (wife beater) and handcuffed at all times.

Great idea!

[Eric Jett]

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This is your hillbilly song.

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Lmao, loving it.

Dunno how the handcuffed kid idea will go down though!

Keep em coming

I'll head down to the thrifty store next week.

[Eric Jett]

Make sure you shout "Yeehaw!" a lot and every now and then say "Hey y'all, watch this!" and do something cool/stupid.

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Jett, I dunno if the kids will be able to sing that song though. Must say, suprised me that such stuff existed.

I haven't asked Stas for ideas on songs, but I'm sure in keeping with the country music theme he'd recommend this...

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[Eric Jett]

I'm doing my best to come up with a decent song/tune, all I have so far is this:

I don't know, but I've been told
New Zealand hicks are mighty bold
I don't know, but it's been said
Fool me once, I'll shoot you dead
I don't know but I have heard
You don't mess with the HillBilly Herd

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

I'm doing my best to come up with a decent song/tune, all I have so far is this:

I don't know, but I've been told
New Zealand hicks are mighty bold
I don't know, but it's been said
Fool me once, I'll shoot you dead
I don't know but I have heard
You don't mess with the HillBilly Herd


Awesome, I've thought of having everybody start the song off by saying 'dang,dang,dang,dang,dang' while doing an air banjo, then repeating it after each 2 lines of the song. Ah man, the kids are either gonna love or hate this. The one girl leader who wasn't at the meeting ain't happy at all about the name, but says she may warm to it.

[Eric Jett]

I'll post more of the song as it comes to me. I am actually going to a 5th-6th graders church camp next week as well. So I have to ready myself for that kind of stuff.

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

I'll post more of the song as it comes to me. I am actually going to a 5th-6th graders church camp next week as well. So I have to ready myself for that kind of stuff.


Yeah man. I'm surprised they let me go. I'm quite likely a bad influence, by the end of the camp I've turned the boys into extremely competitive kids and half the girls hate me cause I'm not sensitive enough, or cause I refuse to hug them.

[Stas Chalaev]

This is even better.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9h-4EQdOEQ

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

This is even better.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9h-4EQdOEQ

I couldn't listen past the first 30 seconds of that...

However, Tim McGraw is a lucky guy.

[Eric Johnson]

Thrift store!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Buy overalls.

Cut all sleeves off of shirts.

Find old, crappy baseball caps.

Make a sign using a stick and posterboard, spray paint the team name on it. Note I said stick.

Tattered jeans, I am sure every single one will have at least one pair of those or some old jean shorts.

Have at least one child in a ribbed tank top (wife beater) and handcuffed at all times.

Don't forget the mustard stains on the wife beater!

[Garrick Daft]

Jono,

One of the people has to be the hillbilly who doesn't know he's a hillbilly and tries to be a cityslicker.

requirements.
--slightly glazed over look in eyes.
--patched leather jacket
--blue jeans (with that tight roll-up at the bottom, copenhagen in back pocket)
--greasy tusseled hair with an ever so slight touch of mulletness (rat tail tucked in shirt will do also)
--jacked up shaving job (missed shaving patches of hair on face)
--dress shoes with dirty white tubed socks
--braided belt (extra long so that the end can dangle down in front)
--couple of dirty fingernails
--talks bad about those less fortunate (clearly clueless that he is below them)
--refers to the retarded as retards
--cheap polo shirt rip-off
--winks a lot
--talks with food falling out of mouth

maybe i can think of more later!

have fun Jono!!

Garrick

[Corey DuCharme]

........grease stains too. You need to track down some Billybob teeth. I've seen cheap ones around.

Oh yeah, have them pick out hillbilly names for themselves: Jethro, Cletus, Billybob, Gomer, Sister-Cousin, Uncle Jed, Cousin Merle, Brother-Dad, Corey, yeah that's right, I'm a hillbilly!!

[lhprop1]

Nevermind.

[Brandon R.]

How could nobody post this yet?

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[Jeremy Leonard]

How could nobody post this yet?

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<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/esl2NNOtHQE" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="350" width="425"></object>

I was waiting for someone to post something from deliverance.

[Kevin Cronin]

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This is your hillbilly song.

mother of God. I knew we should've let them win the War.

The first time I saw that clip from deliverance was years ago, before I had seen the movie. Lemme tell you, that scene is a LOT more ominous knowing what's coming up.

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Dang dang dang dang dan ding dang dang dang

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Awesome stuff guys, Garrick, I'll def keep that in mind. I don't think I've seen a single pair of dungarees in NZ except those worn by pregnant women. Out of luck there.

[ADAMBAUER]

Here ya go Jono
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[Garrick Daft]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070622/ap_on_fe_st/odd_new_zealand_baby_name;_ylt=AjaVxJNkgmAiLSk50QC CYBcDW7oF

contact these people for expert advice.

WTF! :LOL:

[Evan Gibbs]

I dont know how to get a movie on here, but go to youtube and type in squidbillies. Its a cartoon with a bunch of squids that are hillibillies... Sounds stupid but very funny. Definetely not appropriate for kids, but it will give you some ideas, or just make you laugh.

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Alright well, thanks for your help boys! Used quite a few ideas throughout the camp.

Hillbilly Herd won the team title at camp! Victory! Other teams didn't know what hit them. I've been on the camp 3 years and my team has won 3 years in a row. :LOL: It's not boasting if you did it, right? Great team spirit showed through, we easily won the best team chant too.

Here's a few pics. I'm the mildly large guy...

http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/2840/fuelcamp419ad1.jpg

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Man, I'm pretty. [sarcasm]

http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/4139/fuelcamp290fv8.jpg

http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/4097/fuelcamp640br5.jpg

Dontcha Kristyn, Dontcha! :B:

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Task: Using a rope as a pulley, as a team pull your kayak over the wooden beam and continue up the hill.

Where are the Hillbilly Herd? Out of the picture at the next stage because a certain weightlifter decided to practice his 'weight for height' with a kayak. I know you're meant to let the kids do as much as possible, but sometimes you just got to hurry up!

http://img74.imageshack.us/img74/6066/fuelcamp603mo1.jpg

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

Girls got sent to come up with a chant and practice it. So that included me :o

http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/8156/fuelcamp301ym9.jpg

I know Jett cares, so I'll post what we came up with.


Team before us started taking the mickey out of us, while READING their chant (Sliding down a bannister, landing on a cactus, hillbillies need more practice etc), so we started off in a circle...

Me: Well ya'll, we can't read our chant like you cityslickers, but sliding down a bannister landing on a cactus? We don't need more practice, we gon make ya'all squeel like pigs. (thankfully 12 year olds haven't watched Deliverance). Hillbillies?

HB: Yeehaaaw

Me: When I say Bangers, you say mash, Bangers Hb:(mash) x2
Mary, you say Sue
Billy, you say Bob
Corn, you say Cob

I then play a fake banjo, dang dang dang dang dang.....

Hillbilly herd start galloping like horses on the spot.

Girl: Hilly!

HB: What?

Billy!

What?

Hillbilly!

Herd Herd (high pitched voice)- repeat Hilly! What? louder.

Whole team mount imaginary horses and gallop out door.

I guess you would have to have been there, but it went off.

[Kevin Cronin]

Alright well, thanks for your help boys! Used quite a few ideas throughout the camp.

Hillbilly Herd won the team title at camp! Victory! Other teams didn't know what hit them. I've been on the camp 3 years and my team has won 3 years in a row. :LOL: It's not boasting if you did it, right? Great team spirit showed through, we easily won the best team chant too.

Here's a few pics. I'm the mildly large guy...

http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/2840/fuelcamp419ad1.jpg

I can't be the only one who thought the two kids in front of jono with their bandanas covering their faces looked like Crips ...

[HunterHenzler]

I can't be the only one who thought the two kids in front of jono with their bandanas covering their faces looked like Crips ...
haha...nice

So I take it I probabaly shouldn't watch 'deliverance'? Ma had told me it was pretty...disgusting...but I still kinda watch it, to see what all happens...

[KevinRoss]

I don't know if this is helpful at all, but here is some lyrics to some Charlie Daniel songs:

A FEW MORE REDNECKS:
What this world needs is a few more rednecks
Some people ain’t afraid to take a stand
What this world needs is a little more respect
For the Lord and the law and the workin’ man
We could use a little peace and satisfaction
Some good people up front to take the lead
A little less talk and a little more action
And a few more rednecks is what we need
I was raised on beans and cornbread
And I like my chicken fried
Yes, I drive a pickup truck
And I’m full of American pride
I keep a Bible on my table
I got a flag out on my lawn
And I don’t believe in mindin’
No one’s business but my own
And I love them Rambo movies
I think they make a lot of sense
And it’s a shame ole John Wayne
Didn’t live to run for president

And I don’t care what nobody says
I don’t trust ole Gorbachev
And I don’t know who turned him on
But it’s time to turn him off
What this world needs is a few more rednecks
Some people ain’t afraid to take a stand
What this world needs is a little more respect
For the Lord and the law and the workin’ man
We could use a little peace and satisfaction
Some good people up front to take the lead
A little less talk and a little more action
And a few more rednecks is what we need
Now they’re tryin’ to take my guns away
And that would be just fine
If you take ‘em away from the criminals first
I’ll gladly give ya mine
And I don’t mind payin’ taxes
But it makes my temper itch
When my hard earned money goes
To make some politician rich
What most people call a redneck
Ain’t nothin’ but a workin’ man
And he makes his livin’
By the sweat of his brow
And the calluses on his hands
Now you intellectuals may not like it
But there ain’t nothin’ that you can do
Cause there’s a whole lot more of us common-folks
Then there ever will be of you
What this world needs is a few more rednecks
Some people ain’t afraid to take a stand
What this world needs is a little more respect
For the Lord and the law and the workin’ man
We could use a little peace and satisfaction
Some good people up front to take the lead
A little less talk and a little more action
And a few more rednecks is what we need
That’s what we need
And a few more rednecks is what we need

SIMPLE MAN:
I ain't nothing but a simple man
Call me a redneck, I reckon that I am
But there's things goin' on that make me mad down to the core
I have to work like a dog to make ends meet
There's crooked politicians and crime in the street
And I'm madder than hell and I ain't gonna take it no more
We tell our kids to just say no
And then some panty waist judge lets a drug dealer go
And he slaps him on the wrist and he turns him back out on the town
Well, if I had my way with people sellin' dope
I'd take a big tall tree and a short piece of rope
And hang 'em up high and let 'em swing till the sun goes down

Chorus:
Well you know what's wrong with the world today
People done gone and put their Bibles away
There livin' by law of the jungle not the law of the land
Well the good book says it, so I know it's the truth
An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth
You'd better watch where you go
And remember where you've been
That's the way I see it I'm a simple man

Now, I'm the kind of man that wouldn't harm a mouse
But if I catch somebody breakin' in my house
I've got a twelve gauge shotgun waitin' on the other side
So don't go pushin' me against my will
I don't want to have to fight you but I durn sure will
So if you don't want trouble that you'd better just pass me on by
As far as I'm concerned there ain't no excuse
For the raping and the killing and the child abuse
And I've got a way to put and end to all that mess
You just take those rascals out in the swamp
Put them on their knees and tie 'em to a stump
And let the rattlers and the bugs and the alligators do the rest

[KevinRoss]

Oops; nevermind. I didn't read through the whole thread first to see your thing already happened.

[Jonathan Macfarlane]

I can't be the only one who thought the two kids in front of jono with their bandanas covering their faces looked like Crips ...


Haha yeah, some people are just too cool to be Hillbillies.

Unfortunately you only get to meet your team on day 2 of camp, so you can't get them to prepare anything.

KevRoss, haha thanks, wait till next years camp.

[ADAMBAUER]

Congrats on the win Jono! Looks like you had a blast!